When to Say "Goodbye"

​Recently, there has been quite an interesting development in my lolita community.

Two of my lolita acquaintances that I greatly admire have come to a crossroads with the fashion. One of these lovely ladies has completely left the fashion while the other is actively in search of some innovative coordinate inspiration.

These recent changes have got me thinking.

When is it a good time to say goodbye to the lolita Fashion hobby?

When you wear lolita fashion, how do you feel overall? Do you feel empowered, beautiful, adorable, royal or unique? Do the prints and accessory pieces help you express the person you are on the inside outwardly? If you feel positive about the style at this point, then perhaps there are other concerns that you can address, such as exploring another lolita sub style. If you no longer have a connection with the clothes or the connection is waning, let's cover a few true but difficult points.

​Ask yourself these important questions:

Does lolita still make me happy?

If you have gotten to this step of the blog post, it appears to be time for a serious fashion change. Maybe it is as simple as a wardrobe make over in another lolita style. Just like my change from Over-The-Top Sweet to Classical Sweet reflects the person I was to the person I am now, maybe another sub-style of lolita will be a better fit for you. Browse the styles that you have had a budding curiosity in for years and see if it is something you would be interested in pursing.

​Then again maybe the lolita atheistic no longer suites you and you want to peruse another type of fashion. This is 100% okay. It is possible to step away from the fashion - people leave all of the time.
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How do these clothes make me feel?

Take the list of highlighted reasons that you made before this question and review how these reasons truly make you feel. If you still feel positive about the reasons you gave, you truly do not have anything to worry about. On the other hand, if the idea of a new dress release feels like a terrible omen for you and your wallet, it might be time to move to the next honest question.
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While you look over the lolita items in your closet think, "How do these clothes make me feel?"

Change is hard, but change is good.

Life is all about change and often change is unexpected. When I started wearing lolita, I was head-over-heels in love with Over-The-Top Sweet lolita. At that time, the more split color wigs, pastel fairy-kei accessories and loud sweet prints for a coordinate the better! ​Years later my lolita style and tastes have changed drastically. Now, I tend to feel more attracted to Classical Sweet and Sweet lolita styles. A progression and change in a fashion style is only natural. Fashion in itself is a process. ​
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What is it that I love about lolita?

What is is about lolita fashion that you adore? What is is about fills and lace that sends you into a tizzy? Is it the dress releases, the uniqueness of the aesthetic or the cute accessories? It is important to highlight exactly why you put so much time and energy into this hobby that you love so much.
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Lolita is what you do, not who you are.

Make sure that you are staying true to yourself and doing what makes you happy.
This is especially true if you need to step away from the hobby.
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Lolita is a hobby just like any other. Just because you are passionate about it does not define who you are as a person. If you decide to no longer wear lolita fashion you are still the same person regardless of what your new wardrobe choices are.


The most important lesson to take away from Lolita is to be yourself. While I am sad to see my friends leave the fashion, I find satisfaction in the knowledge that they are on the path of happiness.

Stay Frilly,